One For The Road
by Ohyesidid
Summary: John hasn't spoken to his father in a very long time and sitting here alone he remembers why. He thinks back to when it all fell apart and goes back to when it all came crashing down. AU this is in no way related to my other SGA stories.


I do not own Stargate Atlantis or the super awesome characters.

Completely AU, just a little some then that came to me today.

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Why does he always do this to me? And I fall for it every time, like it will be different this time. After 30 years you would think I wouldn't still be doing this. He calls out of the blue wants to have lunch and can't even show up on time.

Dad and I never really got along and hadn't since mom died when I was a teenager. Before mom had died from cancer, everything had been great between the four of us. Mom and dad had a great marriage and had this unmistakable love that anyone could see.

They had been married for years before Dave came along and then four years later I showed up. Apparently, I was not expected and it took my dad time to adjust to the idea of having a second kid.

And not just another kid, no he had to adjust to the idea of another son. He only wanted one child to carry on the Sheppard name, so only a son would do. So, when mom found out she was pregnant it through a wrench in his plan.

Growing up Dave and I got along about as great as brothers do; he was older than me and next in line for the family business. I idolized him for the longest time and followed him everywhere, trying to be like him.

Until I found out I like cars and planes better than business, I tried boxing, football and skateboarding and loved it all. I was a kid enjoying life, until mom got sick and then it all went downhill from there. For a while nothing changed until she started to get worst from the treatment.

I was good at math and science, the top of my class and I knew I could go to any college I wanted. But that wasn't important to me, mom and I used to talk about life after school. I was filled with dreams of taking on the world and couldn't wait.

Dad was at a loss and I guess didn't know how to take care of two teenage boys. One of whom was the perfect son and was doing everything right, while the other was just trying to understand why his mom was so sick.

When dad found out how good I was in school he started to push me and I don't mean in the 'you can be better' or the 'I just wants you to excel' kind of way.

He signed me up for extra classes and wanted me to be perfect like Dave and I started to crack. It wasn't me and didn't like the way he was pushing me and it started to show. I rebelled in little ways and for a while we all worked it out.

But then mom died and dad didn't know how to be a parent or how to understand his children. He was trying to control me like I was a part of a business and he couldn't see it wasn't working, that we were getting further away from each other.

We clashed over everything from homework, to if I was allowed to hang out with my friends. Dave also began to see me as the ungrateful child who did nothing but cause trouble and disobey orders from dad. Orders, can you believe that?

Dave took all the shine and prestige that a Sheppard with hard work and determination get or that's at least what dad told me.

I was doing everything else and making the most of it too, Dave was in love with the idea of taking over the business when dad retired. He was more than willing to work alongside him until that moment came and it was good for them.

To have that father and son dream, they worked well together for a long time. Dave went to a very expensive and highly impressive collage when I was entering high school. He excelled at it all while he was there and brought home nice girls from nice families.

While I made sure to stay in the back, it was easier to avoid my dad's disappointment if he didn't remember I was there. After mom died I was mad and angry at the world and dad that I began to take it out on him.

We fought and yelled for the four years I had left of high school, and it wasn't pretty by any standards. We smiled and laughed in public but out of the eye of friends and business associates we went to war with each other.

I wanted to fly for as long as I could remember, it was one of those things I had talked to mom about before she died. So when I got into a car accident my junior year that dream went out the window, I broke my arm and damaged one of my eyes.

I had a lot of damaged muscle and deep lacerations, not to mention the breaks and sprains. I was in bad shape and spent the rest of the school year in a hospital bed. But my eye is what really got me, I could see but if I wasn't careful I could lose my sight.

Good eyesight is something you need to fly. I got depressed and lonely after the accident, I did eventually see without any complications but the dream was dead. My father paid the bills and hired someone to take care of me until I was better but that's not the same thing as having your father there with you.

Thinking back on it, he was thinking about mom in the hospital and couldn't deal.

He still could have been there and Dave was too busy being a hot shot in his fancy college to care. Once he found out I was alive, he didn't come home at all. So I got depressed and I spent days staring at the walls, and for a year that how it was.

Until graduation that is, we were sitting at the dinner table one night Dave was home that weekend. When dad asked what college I had decided on, he wanted to call and talk to the headmaster or whatever. I informed him I didn't apply for any colleges and didn't plan too.

That set him off about how I was ungrateful and had no ambition. That I was never going to be as great as Dave and I snapped, and I just couldn't take it anymore.

I stood up slowly and looked him in the eye and told him exactly what had been eating away at me for all those years. That I was never going to be Dave and he needs to realize that, and that I didn't care what he thought or what he wanted.

When he started to yell back at me I just walked away from the table before turning back to him. I told him how he left me alone after my accident and neither him nor Dave went to see me in the hospital or when I came back home.

He then proceeded to tell me the accident was my fault and I need to accept that. My fault?! Was he kidding me it was raining and another car came into my lane, hitting me not the other way around. I was so mad and I didn't know what to do, so I left the room.

I spent the next three hours in my room sitting on my bed before I came to a decision. In four days I was 18 and I would be free, I didn't need my father or his money.

When the morning rolled around I packed my bags for when it was time to go, there is no going back now. I spent the next four days in silence; I didn't look at or speak to my brother or father. The days before my birthday I had this need to go and just go but I waited.

I had finished breakfast when dad asked what I planned to do for my birthday. I told him I had my bags packed and made plans to take a road trip with a friend. He did not like that and tried to tell me I wasn't going to throw my life away for a road trip.

It was another argument after that, finally I had enough and told him he didn't have a choice I was 18 the next day. That just because I got my eye back to normal didn't mean I was ever going to get into the Air Force.

That I had no intention of joining the family business and by no means was pushing me towards what he wanted since mom died going to change that. He had one perfect son and he was going to have to live with that.

It was sunrise when I left that house for the last time and I felt relieved, I spent the next four years traveling from town to town with my friend Carson. Working and living like I always felt like I was meant too, be out there meeting people and helping others.

Not stuck in a boardroom, no I was happy with my life. I met a guy named Rodney McKay when I was next to the Canadian border and he was a smart guy who knew it. I went back once a year to see him when he was on summer vacation, I still do that is if he doesn't come to me.

When I was finally ready to stop moving around I knew it, I moved into a little house I had saved up for working my odd jobs. Carson had created a practice in this town years before and I loved it whenever I was visiting.

I was at work when I ran into a big guy with dreads, he was great like to hunt and was into football. We hit it off right away and I felt like I had known him for years.

Rodney even liked him but maintained that he was my first best friend, Ronon was a loner like me and we bonded became closer than Dave and I ever were.

I hadn't spoken to dad in close to ten years by this point and I was okay with that. I had started date Teyla by that point and was happier than I could remember being. Rodney decided that my little town was as good as any to live in and decide to move.

By the time Teyla got married the five was us were best friends and I was happy. Until my dad called my one day out of the blue, how he got my number is beyond me. We mostly said nothing with a few words in between; we were closing into almost fifteen years with no contact.

Why he wanted to call no was lost upon me.

He asked if we could get together and have lunch this Friday, which is how I find myself sitting in a restaurant feeling like nothing changed. He always did this even when I was a kid; no matter what time we were supposed to be there he was always late.

I have been waiting an hour and I am ready to go, so I leave the hostess a message in case by some miracle he does show. Saying that I went home and I don't appreciate him being late, I am not a kid anymore this won't fly with me.

It is almost dinner time when I hear a knock on the door and I have to run and get it. My 2 year old daughter tends to want to try and open the door and almost always hurts herself. Luckily Ronon and Rodney are there and catch her before she makes it.

Man does that kid have some legs on her. I open the door to not only to my father but Dave as well and I am at a loss. They actually came to my home and they look just as tense as I feel, we stand looking at each other before Teyla comes over and invites them in.

They look surprised when they notice the wedding rings and Teylas growing stomach. I don't know why they are here but I guess we will find out but for now I am just going to take in my life before it gets out of control again.

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Bam just a little something. It is a one shot and has nothing to do with my other Stargate Atlantis stories.


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